Time of my Life
by Hatsterstrikesagain
Summary: Cas is in high school and was always the shrinking violet type, keeping herself to herself. That is until Dean Winchester sits down at her table. Girl!Cas Highschool Fic Please tell me what you think it's really helpful for writing future chapters :)
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Her heart was beating very fast, fast and hard. So hard that she felt it would beat straight tout through her ribcage. She could feel her blood pumping; in the base of her stomach, hear it in her ears, even see it on the backs of her eyes. Travelling along at 70 miles an hour the blood rushing around her body was almost all she was aware of. Well, almost. She was scared, she knew that much, yet only of what could happen, not of whom she was with. He looked of his shoulder at her with his big green eyes, causing her breath to catch in her throat. She held on tighter, silently willing him to focus on the road. She could feel the planes of his chest and stomach through the thin material of his kaki t-shirt.

He had given her his motorcycle jacket, in a vague hope of making her feel safer on the back of his bike, and to reassure her mum that she would be fine with both leathers and a helmet, her conditions to let Cas go out at all on a motorbike. But Cas was glad of it, not because of the cold she was wearing her favourite trench coat, but because it enveloped her in his smell, a sharp spicy smell yet soft with a hint of vanilla.

His back was warm against her cheek as she tried to slow her breath enough to sit up and ask "how much further?" into his ear. As she sat up, she left the shelter his back was giving, entering the wind blowing against them, causing her long black hair escaping from under her helmet to blow away behind her. He answered her question without turning around, much to her belief, his voice rumbling through his body to her ear, making her shiver. She didn't know what was coming next but she knew that Dean, with his short light brown hair, strong arms and sparkling, shockingly green eyes, would take care of her.

She had noticed him at school, it was hard not to. Peaking over which ever book she had her nose pressed into, she had followed him with her eyes, taking in his strong shoulders, the way the world shined brighter when he laughed his care-free laugh, always with his hands in the pockets of his jeans, radiating his nonchalant attitude. She had realised the first time she saw him that he was miles out of her league. Yet she just couldn't stop thinking about him. Picturing them together on a picnic was her favourite, out in the woods near her house, his green eyes lovingly staring into her clear blue ones, the mottled shade rippling over them.

And yet there she was, her arms wrapped around him on the back of his motorbike. She knew he had a car, for driving his younger brother Sam to school. It was a truly beautiful car, a Chevrolet Impala 1967. Its growling purr made her shiver almost as much as the thought of its owner did. She would have preferred him to have driven that; it would have been safer at least. Although that would have meant convocation, not her strong point. So maybe the motorbike is better. The roar of the engine making even the banal comments on the weather or school impossible, once again, much to her relief.

She spent most of her time in and out of school in the library with her blue eyes glued to the pages of whichever book she could get her hands on, although history or romance were her favourites; all this to avoid small talk which she could not reciprocate. That's why Dean's sudden introduction and date proposal came as such a surprise to her. Cas tried her hardest to be invisible, blending into park benches, lockers, and classroom walls, being as much the proverbial chameleon as possible, although she drew the line at eating flies. She knew that chameleons did really change colour to fit into their surroundings but rather to show their mood. In Cas' case this would have been beetroot. She spent an awful lot of time blushing; if she dropped her pen, coughed in a quiet moment in class, bumped into someone no matter how lightly in the corridors, anything really.

So when Dean approached her table at lunch and slid in opposite her, she went the brightest shade of red ever. She couldn't see herself of course just feel the colour rising from the toes of her socks to her hairline. He sat there for a bit waiting for her to say something. But in true Cas fashion she just sat there staring awkwardly at her spaghetti Bolognese, cooling on her tray. She looked up at him briefly, attempting to say something but just opened and shut her mouth like a fish, until realising she had nothing to say closed her mouth and continued staring at her food, feeling his eyes on her. He must have noticed her discomfort as he started simply.

"Hi Cas isn't it? My name's Dean. Well, um… I saw you sitting here on your own, as you seem to do a lot." The realisation that he had noticed her around, made the colour in Cas' cheeks darken, if that was possible. "I… um… wondered if you wanted to grab a shake and uh… some pie some time? I know a great place." He must have seen her hesitance as he added "only if you want to of course…"

She couldn't believe it, it must be a joke. Probably one of her brother's, he loved messing with people. But Dean seemed nervous; she had never imagined he could be, not with the confident and care-free step of his long gait. She suddenly realised she had left the question hanging in the air between them.

"Yeah… um… sure... I guess…" Idiot she thought to herself. Couldn't she have said something a little more eloquent?

He reached across the table, "may I?" taking her wrist in his left hand and a pen out of his pocket with his right. She looked up in confusion.

"If I give you my number, can I trust you to text me?" she didn't want to risk embarrassing herself again, she nodded her head.

He chuckled to himself, lightly pressing the nib of the pen to her skin and running it quickly yet delicately across the back of her hand, passing it back when he had finished. He obviously hand practice, she thought.

"Text me when you decide you are free on Friday." With that he got up, smiled at her and walked away in his usual manner.

Cas just sat there, staring after him, wishing for the ground to swallow here up, at the same time a heavenly chorus was singing 'Halleluiah' in her head. Finally, at the age of 17; her first date.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

And that was how she found herself on the way to a diner with the guy she had fantasised about since she had first seen him sauntering down the corridor with his arm slung over a blonde's shoulders.

They started to slow down, Cas had the chance to notice where they were. She recognised it vaguely, as though she had driven down here once with her parents a long time ago; a long, long time ago. All she had left now were her brother, and even then only Gabriel really cared about her.

They pulled into a car park. The neon sign flashed 'The Roadhouse'. Dean got off motioning towards her waist to lift her off. She blushed but let him, squirming under his touch as his hands tickled her.

"Sorry", he laughed, "I'll remember that though so be warned."

True to form, Cas blushed, reddened further when he looked down at her with the cheeky twinkle he used on the teachers when he wanted to cover up a blatant lie. He motioned to the diner with his arm, his plaid shirt rolled up to his elbows.

"The people who own this place are practically family. Charlie, the waitress, is my best friend, Jo's like the little sister I never had, and Ellen, her mum, she's kind of like an aunt I suppose."

Cas found this sweet, she had heard, mostly in hushed voice in the girl's loos, that Dean had a far from happy home life. That he had to look after his little brother Sam whilst his deadbeat dad was away for days on end "working". She didn't want to mention her crappy family life, so she nodded smiling and asked how long they had owned the place.

"As long as I can remember", he replied walking towards the front door and indicating for her to do the same.

They walked in, Cas with her hands shoved deep into the pockets of her coat. It made her feel safe in a situation that was far from her usual routine. A light brown haired woman stood behind the counter, her face marked with laughter lines, her eyes were friendly warming the minute she saw Dean.

"I wondered when one would finally merit you bringing her here", she said once again bringing colour to Cas' cheeks.

"Hey Ellen", Dean said as a red-haired girl in an apron ran out from what must have been the kitchen, and flew her arms round Dean's neck, kissing him on the cheek.

"DEAN!" she shouted, "I missed you, you numbskull, where have you been?" She stepped back glancing round him to look at Cas. "Who's she?" she asked leaning into him, "she's cute?" she said wrinkling her nose as though Cas was a nice pair of shoes.

Dean batted her away hissing "mitts off, she's mine", as he made his was over to what Cas imagined was his usual booth. The waitress, Cas realised it was Charlie, followed them over.

"The usual?" she asked Dean.

"Yeah thanks and…", he looked over at Cas, who froze momentarily at the warmth in his gaze,

"uh… a chocolate milkshake and um…"

" Apple pie?" Dean added, looking over at Cas, his eyebrows risen with the question.

Cas nodded.

"And two apple pies, please Charlie."

He grinned at the redhead and she walked away, glancing back over her shoulder to wink at Dean. Cas noticed and snapped her eyes down to the table where someone had spilled several grains of sugar, or maybe salt she thought. Feeling eyes on the top of her head, she looked up, meeting Dean's stare, once again shocked by the colour. She sensed he wanted her to start talking.

"Charlie seems… enthusiastic" she offered.

"Yeah, I haven't been here in a while, Sammy's struggling at school so I've been trying to help him out, but history's not really my strong point…"

"I… I could help if you want?"

"Inviting yourself over now, are you?"

Cas blushed, she had heard the joke in his voice but was so unused to talking to anyone, let alone Dean Winchester. It had been forward, oh why had she said that? Luckily, Charlie walked over, at that point, placing two slices of apple pie, Cas' milkshake and Dean's coke on the table.

Cas sipped the milkshake, thankful for the opportunity to think of something to say next. She hazarded a guess.

"How's your car?" Cas didn't really know anything about cars but she knew that Dean loved his Impala and she loved to noise of its engine, so it seemed a good conversation starter.

"Do you really care about her?"

"I… uh… don't really know anything about cars, but yours is beautiful."

"Yeah, she's quite something", said Dean smiling to himself.

The conversation was stilted and awkward and yet she was comfortable in his presence, more than she could say pretty much anyone else at their school. Even Gabriel made her jumpy, but that was only because she was nervous as to what joke he would try on her next, salt in her tea was his favourite and got her every time.

She was broken out of her thoughts be Dean's soft voice.

"You ok? How's the pie?"

She had completely forgotten about it. Delicately she stuck in her fork, breaking off a piece of the pastry, bringing it up to her mouth. The sweetness exploding on her tongue, she let out a quiet moan.

A nervous chuckle rumbled its way across the table, "good huh?" he smiled. She returned the gesture, looking at him through her lashes.

They held gazes for what must have been a few seconds but felt like eons lost in the warmth and comfort his eyes offered her. Neither wanted to look away, but as she felt her cheeks colouring, under the intensity of his regard, she dropped her eyes, the butterflies in her stomach beating their wings ferociously. Cas had only ever read about looks like that, and she had certainly never thought someone would look at her in that way. She quietly continued to eat her pie.

Noticing Dean had finished, she shyly asked "do you want to go? I'm sure Ellen wouldn't mind wrapping this up."

He looked confused, "why are you so eager to leave?"

"I thought maybe you wanted to, you have finished."

He shrugged, "I'm ok, but we do have somewhere to go next before I drop you home, so yes, I think that's a good idea."

He stood up, his cheeky grin glued to his lips as though he was feeling very proud of his efforts. As he walked over to the counter, Ellen looked up at him, the motherly look in her eyes.

"Was there a problem?" she asked concerned as she noticed the unfinished plate of apple pie in Dean's hands.

"No, thank you Ellen, it was perfect, he grinned, but could you wrap this up for me? I'm taking Cas…" With that he leaned in, talking to her in hushed tones, too quiet for Cas to hear still sitting in the booth.

From the look on Ellen's face when they pulled back, where Dean had decided to take her next was obviously a good choice in her mind. She made quick work of packing up the pie, passing the small box back to Dean with a soft expression in her eyes and the set of her mouth.

Cas could see it was pride. She was proud of Dean and, presumably, the way he looked after his brother. There was something more though; love. The way a mother looks at her child. Cas could tell from that one look, that Ellen cared for him very much. That made Cas more nervous than she already was; Ellen did not seem like that type of woman who take kindly to anyone hurting her surrogate son.

Dean walked back over, holding his hand out to take hers and bring her up to standing. Her heart fluttered at his touch, it was warm yet not at all clammy as she assumed hers were. He led her past Ellen; she smiled at Cas, the tender look still on her face.

Dean stopped half way out of the door, looking back towards the counter, "tell Jo she owes me a burger", he called.

Ellen laughed, "will do, now you two go and have fun."

With that they stepped out into the mild evening; the purple-grey clouds peeking out from behind the rooftops.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

It was getting dark, Cas wished she had someone to worry about her being back before her curfew, but only her and Gabe lived in their house now and he would most likely be out till all hours with whichever "skirt", as he would put it, had taken his fancy, probably a blonde, whoever would have him. Gabriel did care about her, just was more interested in getting his fill of girls, cake and dessert wine, anything sickly sweet. If there was anyone who had a sweet tooth, it was her brother.

Dean held her hand all the way out to the motorbike, helping her on with her helmet, before putting on his own and placing the little box in the space under the seat.

"Where are we going?" Cas asked anxious excitement in her voice.

"You'll see", Dean answered, his eyes twinkling in the light from the diner that was spilling out onto the car park. He got onto the bike, pulling her arms around him tightly. "Don't let go", he said winking.

They rode through the town, swapping lanes every now and then to avoid the lessening traffic. At the next set of lights, Dean indicated left, pulling out onto the road that led out of town. Cas shifted slightly in confusion.

Dean felt her movement, looking over his shoulder he said, "don't worry I'm not kidnapping you, it's just a few miles out of town, you'll like it."

They carried on, the road giving way to winding lanes.

It felt like only a few seconds before Dean was pulling his bike over into a layby, an overgrown path leading away through a break in the hedgerow. He got down first, before once again lifting Cas off, being careful not to tickle her again; helping her off with her helmet and placing it on the seat before taking her hand and leading her out into the undergrowth, careful to hold any branches back.

Cas followed him impatiently, itching to see where he was taking her. All of a sudden they stepped out of the tall grass onto the top of very steep slope, a single wooden bench the only sign of civilisation. That was until she stepped forward to sit down on the cold wood of the seat. The view was breath taking.

"You can see the whole town from up here!" she exclaimed gripping tightly on Dean's hand.

"I come up here all the time, to think, to escape Sammy when he's being a pain in the arse. I think I'm the only one who knows it exists, well except you now… so don't go telling anyone", he arched his eyebrow at her, the motion making her heart skip a beat.

How was it legal for someone to be so good-looking? She turned her head to look at the view once again. In the twilight, she could see bats looping in the night breeze to catch insects. Below them the street lights were turning on one by one turning the road into runways for toy aeroplanes.

She didn't know how long they'd been sitting there in the comfortable silence, but Cas was happy, her smile almost reaching from ear to ear. Siting listening to the night was one of her favourite things.

She did it all the time at home, sat on the windowsill, feet dangling into the crisp air, blanket wrapped around her shoulders. She alternated between reading and simply being, content in her own company. Often she fell asleep, waking up in her own bed in the morning. That was how she knew her brother loved her. No matter how tired, drunk or stuffed to burst on deserts of all kinds, he would always come in to check in on her, carrying her back to her bed and pulling the duvet around her slight frame, whenever he found her unconscious head leant against the window frame.

She sensed Dean shift next to her, rather than see or feel it. He was looking at her, not staring, just looking at her profile against the darkening sky. Cas' favourite sky was at this time of day. When the setting sun causes the horizon to explode in red, the whole colour spectrum stretching up into the dark indigo speckled with stars.

She returned his look, her eyes skimming over his face, down to his perfectly formed mouth, save for a slight knick under his bottom lip, and back to his eyes, almost glowing green in the low light. She noticed him do the same thing, and blushed a little. Dean reached out his hand and ran his thumb over the colour on her cheek bones. The skin on the pad of his thumb was calloused; she wondered why and decided to ask him later.

All of a sudden, Cas realised what the contact meant: her first kiss. That was when the internal panic started. Were her lips cracked? Did she tilt her head left or right? Was he going to use tongue? It must have shown on her face because Dean said, quietly so as not to shatter the peace of the evening,

"hey, it's alright I got you."

He leaned in slowly, tilting his head to the right; 'Ok right it is', Cas said to herself, her internal monologue still babbling. She copied his actions, but where he was smooth and fluid, she was awkward, the voices in her head shouting one on top of the other. Her mother scalded her, her brother egged her on, and her own voice was still floundering. They all fell silent at the pressure on her lips. His mouth was warm, his lips soft, the kiss gentle. He pulled away, Cas let out the breath she hadn't realised she was holding.

"Now, that wasn't so bad was it?" Dean asked jokingly, the caring tone still in his voice. She shook her head, it was amazing, it had silenced her inner babble, not an easy feat. She went to lean back in but Dean had turned away, reaching into the pocket of his jeans. He pulled out a man's bracelet, 'Dean' engraved onto the surface. He gently picked her hand off her lap and fastened it around her wrist, tucking the spare chain down the cuff of her coat.

"But... but… I can't take this…" Cas stammered, "it's only our first date. How do you know that you even like me?"

It was Dean's turn to blush. "I… just feel different around you. This is definitely not my first my first date, but it is my favourite yet. You heard Ellen; I've never taken anyone other than Sammy to the Roadhouse, and certainly never brought anyone up here."

Through his confession he had been playing with Castiel's hand still resting on his leg.

"What makes me so different?" Cas asked, curious as to what his answer would be.

"I don't know", he replied, "I just feel like I've known you forever, like… we are just meant to be together. We click."

Cas caught her breath, really? Did he really think that? She was broken out her revelries once again as Dean pressed his lips to hers, the sounds of the crickets chirruping around them, and the occasional bark from down in the town, the only sounds to break the stillness and perfection of the evening.


	4. Chapter 4

What felt like hours later, Cas finally noticed the pitch blackness around them. After the kiss, she had lent her head against Dean's shoulder, feeling the muscle through his thin shirt.

"Aren't you cold?" she asked him, realising she was still wearing his jacket and making to take it off.

"Yeah, a little, but don't worry you can keep it. I have a zillion others at home."

"Really?" Cas replied, questioning both the fact that she was allowed to keep the leather jacket and the fact that he had a collection.

"Yeah, they were my dad's." She felt him stiffen slightly at the mention of his dad, but shook it off, "you'll have to come and see them, some are really pretty."

Cas smiled, she had no idea Dean was this human, normal. She had always seen him as a jock, cool, girls falling at his feet, and yet he was more and less and the same time. He was beautiful and had a way with people that made you want to do whatever he told you, and yet just wanted to sit on a bench looking out over the lights of the town with the school's bookworm, when he could have been at a party with a cheerleader on each arm.

They sat like that, Cas' head on Dean's shoulder, every now and then one would comment on something, the other would agree and then they both would return into the comfortable silence, their breathing mirrored, their fingers intertwined. That was when Cas noticed the time on the face of Dean's black watch.

"Crap!" Cas sat up quickly, it was almost one in the morning. Gabe would either be home or in the process of getting there, he would panic. She hadn't told him where she was going in an aim to avoid the banter, maybe not such a good idea when your brother was the 'call the police first, ask questions later' kind of guy. "I need to get home; my brother's going to flip!"

Dean sat up looking at his watch, he too noticed the time. "Oh crap! I told Sam I'd be back at ten." He stood up taking Cas' hand. "Time flies when you're having fun, eh." He winked.

They walked back through down the overgrown path, Dean holding the branches out of the way, as he did on the way to the bench. Cas put on her helmet herself this time as Dean climbed on he turned around to her,

"thank you for tonight."

"Why are you thanking me? You organised this." The smile was evident in her voice.

"Yes, but it wouldn't have been nearly so special if I had done it by myself", he returned her smile.

"Now get on, or our brothers will beat us three ways from Sunday."

He had a fair point so without another word; she got on the back of the bike, once again wrapping her arms around Dean. Somehow it felt different, good different, as though before she had just been holding on so as not to fall off; now it was more like she was holding on because he wanted her too, not just to save her from tumbling off the back, but he wanted to share that moment with her.

"So, where to now?" they were back within the town limits heading down the main street.

"Left at the bottom, down to the end, right and third on the left."

"And straight on till morning", Dean teased.

She giggled, it was quite appropriate; Gabe was the veritable Peter Pan, complete with the sense of humour of a six year old.

They pulled up in front of her house. The lights were on; Cas noticed the upstairs curtain twitch as the engine cut out.

"Thank you, Dean, I had fun."

"As far as first dates go it wasn't too bad was it?"

"Not at all", Cas smiled, thinking to herself that it was the best night of her life, "see you around?"

"I'll ring you tomorrow?" he asked.

"Of course", she replied. She started to walk towards to her front door.

"Where do you think you're going?" he said playfully holding on to her wrist and pulling her in for a kiss.

She knew she would get teased for weeks; she could feel Gabriel's eyes on her back and could easily picture him raising her eyebrows.

"Good… goodnight", she said once her heart rate had slowed down enough to let her speak.

"Sleep well", he looked at her once more with those beautiful, warm green eyes before turning the key in the ignition and kicking off from the curb.

She followed him down the street with her eyes, grinning to herself, at the same time preparing herself for the onslaught of mocking the minute she put one foot through the door.

Once Dean had rounded the corner, she turned in her heels and walked towards the blue painted door, the colour had been her idea, it was welcoming in her opinion, even if the only people it welcomed was her, her brother and the postman. She turned the handle and entered into the dark hallway, pushing on the wood of the door to close it so as to avoid the creaking, a trick taught to her by the master of silent exits, Gabriel.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The thunder of feet down the stairs confirmed her fears.

Gabriel grabbed her waist, twirling her down the hall; "I know you, I danced with you once upon a dream. I know you, the gleam in your eyes is such a familiar gleam", Gabriel sang, off tune, as he danced Cas into the kitchen.

She smacked him in the stomach,

"hey!" he exclaimed. He leered over her, raising an eyebrow and stage whispered, "so, who's prince charming on the noble, metal steed?"

"Shut up Gabe", Cas replied.

She was still reeling from their parting kiss, and tired. She wanted to go to sleep, in her own bed, bundled up in her duvet; hopefully to dream about Dean, or at least relive the amazing evening.

"Gabe, I'm tired."

"That is not the answer to my question", he replied, leaping to block the kitchen door, and therefore, her only exit.

"Oh, come on Cassie", he pleaded, "then I will let through and you can go dream of his butt or something."

"No Gabe, let me through and I'll tell you in the morning", she jabbed him in the side, slipping passed him and running up the stairs to her bedroom, while her brother contorted in the doorway.

She walked across her bedroom and sat down on her bed, picking up her phone from her bedside table where she had left it in her hurry to get out the door. She had one unread message; it read 'Sammy was fast asleep when I got home', with a picture of a young, blonde haired boy curled up on the sofa, the TV still on in the background. She scrolled past the picture, 'goodnight gorgeous'.

Gorgeous? Dean Winchester thought she was gorgeous? He must need his eyes testing she thought to herself. Cas was not plain, not by anyone's standards. Her long raven black hair was wavy and hung in loose ringlets under her chin; her eyes the colour of forget-me-nots; and yet she had always felt something was off, pretty but not really beautiful, not with the almost permanent blush on her face. She quickly undressed, pulling on her pyjamas, the ones with the little angel wings on the bottoms; before lying down and pulling the duvet around her shoulders.

She could hear Gabriel in the kitchen downstairs, Angel Delight, she thought to herself. It was Gabe's favourite late night food, probably because it was easy and sweet, and therefore, reflected his personality perfectly.

A breeze from the window, wafted at the curtains, lifting them to allow the cool air into the room. Cas smiled as it blew gently across her face pulling at the fly-aways from her head before letting them fall back onto her face, tickling her forehead. She closed her eyes, listening to the sounds of the town that she found so relaxing, and drifted off into a belated and deep sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

She woke up tangled in the sheets, breathing heavily, Gabriel leaning over her, his hands on her shoulders; he had obviously shaken her awake.

"Cassie, what's wrong?! You were screaming again!"

"I… I… don't know", she stammered, trying to remember what her nightmare had been about.

"Are you going to be all right?"

Gabriel asked her sitting on the side of her bed and looking at her with worry in his whiskey coloured eyes, his longish brown hair crumpled from sleep.

Cas noticed sheet lines on his cheek, revealing that he had fallen asleep face down on his bed.

"I... think so", Cas replied, "go back to bed Gabe, you look exhausted."

There were dark circles under his eyes, which were mirrored on her face, showing the effects that her night terrors were having on both of them. It had been going for a couple of weeks, Cas waking up in the early hours of the morning, her duvet either on the floor or twisted around her, Gabriel shaking her awake. They both hoped that she would remember her dream but as of yet she had still not remembered.

Gabriel stood up, looking back over at her as he walked out the door, "I will be glad when this dreaming crap stops. I won't have to run into your room at ridiculous o'clock in the morning thinking you've been smothered to death", he smiled weakly and shut the door quietly.

She could hear his heavy footfalls as he walked back to his room. She felt really bad. Not only was she disturbing her own sleep, but she was disturbing his as well. The door to her brother's room shut, as Cas lay her head back against the pillow. She really wished she could just recall what her nightmare was about.

She hadn't spoken to Dean about it, despite him sitting with her every lunch time and questioning her on how tired she looked. She just said that she's been reading late, worried that if she told him she would scare him off; he was the best thing that had ever happened to her. They fit perfectly. She didn't want to frighten him away with some mad night time terror story.

She lay there and racked her brains. Could she remember anything? Yes. Falling. She remembered falling. She didn't know where from or to, but at least it was a start. She turned over to check the time on her phone. The clock was ticking on the wall behind her but Gabe had turned the light off on his way out of her room and the dull glow from the streetlamps was not enough to show the hands. 4:37.

'Eugh', Cas thought to herself. Too early to get up and yet she didn't really feel like going back to sleep. She wondered if Dean was up. Why would he be it was half four in the morning. It was worth a shot anyway.

'Hi… I know it's early but I need to talk to you.'

He must have had his phone nearby, for he texted back only a few minutes later, 'Why? What's wrong? I'm coming over.'

What about Sam she thought to herself, and then recalled that the younger boy slept like a log at any time of day, and considering it was the weekend wouldn't be up till around 10. Dean said it was because he was growing, but the boy was approaching five foot ten as it was and would definitely be taller than his brother.

Dean roared down the road five minutes later, his engine cutting out in front of their house, just under Cas' window. She got up, grabbing her dressing gown from the back of the door on her way past. Dean was leaning against the front door frame when Cas opened it.

He stepped in and pulled her up into his arms, "what's going on angel? I'm worried, he murmured into the fleece covering her shoulder.

"Come through into the kitchen, do you want something to eat, drink?"

"It's quarter to five in the morning Cas…"

"I know I just need something sweet. How does milk and cookies sound?"

They always had plenty of cookies in, Gabriel's second favourite midnight snack.

"That sounds perfect", Dean smiled at her.

"Go through to the sitting room, I'll bring it in."

She walked over to the fridge, as Dean strode through to the lounge. Pouring two glasses of milk and grabbing a packet of cookies out of the cupboard she walked through the adjoining door to the sitting room. Dean was sat on the sofa, one leg tucked underneath him. He had obviously got dressed in a hurry, the label from his t-shirt sticking out under his chin,

"you do know your shirt's on back to front?" she asked.

He looked down, smirked and pulled it over his head. She blushed, the colour showing up more against the white of her dressing gown and reflected in the hot pink of her bed socks. She usually didn't like the feel of her feet being constricted in bed, but since the dreams had started it had been getting really, really cold in her room.

She stared at his chest as he tried to find the sleeves and put his shirt back on. He had scars across his stomach, which was not rock hard but nicely toned. He had found the neck hole and caught her gaze, winking as he pulled the fabric down across his skin.

She carefully put the glasses down on the coffee table, using coasters to keep the wood free from rings. Gabriel had insisted, he was very house-proud for someone who only brushed his hair once a week. She tore open the coloured plastic, offering the packet to Dean first, before taking one herself and sitting down on the sofa, mirroring Dean's position. She leaned over and picked up the glass, sipping it absentmindedly.

Dean looked at her, "so what's up?" he said through a mouthful of cookie.

"Well… I've been having this nightmare for a couple of weeks now… and I wake up screaming tangled in the sheets. Gabe is really worried…"

"A couple of weeks! Why didn't you tell me?

Cas looked down at her feet, her free hand playing with the belt of her dressing gown. "I didn't want to worry you… or scare you away…"

Dean put his empty glass down, and taking hers out of her hand and doing the same, pulled her over so she was leaning on her shoulder, his arm laid protectively across her back.

"Now why would you think I'd be scared off? Cas, I'm here for you", he said running his thumb over that back of her hand.

"Is that what those dark circles under your eyes are about? I knew they couldn't just be from reading late, you aren't that irresponsible", he smiled.

"Mhmm", was all she managed. She felt so comfortable lying against Dean like that; she couldn't help closing her eyes, breathing in his smell.

"You alright there angel?" he asked quietly against her hair.

"Can I just sleep here for a bit?" she mumbled.

"Of course sweetie" Dean said kissing the top of her head, and shifting so that he could put his head down on the arm rest.

Pulling out his phone he keyed in his home number, knowing full well that Sammy wouldn't answer, but leaving a message so that when he finally woke up he wouldn't call the police or anything stupid like that. He slipped the phone back into his jeans before pulling his arm tighter around Cas, the gentle rhythm of her breathing lulling him off to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Gabriel walked into the sitting room with a bemused look on his face. The couple were curled up together facing each other; Cas' hands were on Dean's chest, his arms wrapped around her shoulders, their foreheads touching. Gabriel could tell the Dean was good for Cas, brought her out of her shell a bit. He walked through to the kitchen, walking on his tiptoes so as not to wake the kids, he poured himself a glass of chocolate milk before going back upstairs, muttering to himself about having Dean round more often if it meant he could get a good night's sleep.

The smell of pancakes wafted through to the sitting room. Cas breathed in the smell; she loved it when her brother cooked, for one she didn't have to worry about doing it herself and she could blissfully ignore, yet savour the taste of, the amount of sugar Gabriel put in everything. She opened her eyes, the bridge of Dean's nose was millimetres away from hers. She giggled at their proximity. Dean groaned, not an early morning person, she figured the nicest way to wake him up was to kiss him gently. She closed the distance between them. He smiled against her mouth and tightened his grip around her slight frame.

"How does pancakes sound?" she asked.  
"Mmmm", he grumbled.  
"Come on, Gabe makes the best", she persuaded.  
"Alright", Dean agreed, sleepily untangling himself from both Cas and the blankets, pushing himself up of the sofa and reaching out a hand to help Cas up.  
She giggled at the sheet marks across his cheeks.  
"You usually in such a good mood in the morning?" he questioned.  
"Nope. Just haven't slept that well in a while..." she replied, slightly embarrassed.  
"Me neither", he grinned, "we should do this more often."  
They padded through to the kitchen, the cold of the tiles waking them up further.  
There was a note from Gabe on the table; 'morning lovebirds, pancakes in the over, maple syrup in the cupboard. I'm seeing Alice today so I'll catch you later. Have fun.'  
"Sit down; I'll bring the stuff over" Cas indicated to the table.  
"No, I'll make the coffee" he smiled sleepily.  
Even though she had seen him almost every day for the past couple of weeks, she hadn't seen him looking as gorgeous as he did now, his hair ruffled from sleep, his eyes giving off a warm glow, his t-shirt creased down the front, where she had been lying not 5 minutes before. She hadn't felt so refreshed for a long time. She caught a glimpse of herself in the window; the dark rings already looked lighter.

She pulled the plate out of the warm oven carefully and carried it over to the table, careful to put it down on a mat. There were enough singes on the table cloth from Gabriel's drunken cake making.  
Dean brought the coffee pot over to the table, kissing Cas on the top of her head before sliding in opposite her.  
"So what are we going to do today?" Dean asked, cocking his eyebrow before taking a mouthful of pancakes and grinning.  
"I don't know..." she said honestly.  
"Well I have to take Sammy to karate at 11, but after that..., he looked out the window at the grey clouds, "the weather's not great so you could come over to mine and watch star wars?"  
Cas laughed at the eager expression on Dean's face.  
"Sure, but as long as we watch the Phantom Menace. It's my favourite."  
"Okey dokey" he smiled once more his mouth full of pancakes, a trickle of maple syrup escaping at the corner of his mouth.

"Do you want a shower?" she asked, aware that Dean would probably like to wash.  
"You go first, I'm gonna finish these" he smiled cheekily, a mischievous glint in his eye, "your bro is a really good cook."  
"You should try the brownies."  
"I'm guessing he has a sweet tooth" he said accurately.  
"You don't know the half of it" she smiled before getting up and making her way upstairs. "I'll be out in about 10 minutes", she called, shutting the door to the bathroom.

The warm water poured down over her. The pounding, working out the kinks she had acquired from sleeping on the sofa. It also provided her with a moment to gather her thoughts. She was going to his house. The house where he lives. She wondered if it would smell of him. Probably, was the result she came to. She realised that she had been stood, her eyes fixed on a chip in the tile where her brother had obviously dropped something. She snapped into action, shampooing then conditioning her hair, before shaving her legs. Nothing was going to happen she thought, almost convincing herself that it was ok to look pretty and have smooth legs.

She stepped out of the shower, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around under her arms. She looked in the mirror, 'I look like the girl from the ring she thought to herself', with her black hair dripping around her shoulders. She pulled another towel off the rack, careful to leave one for Dean, and tied her hair up in a turban.

Stepping out of the door, she almost crashed into Dean walking across the landing.

"Sorry." She said embarrassed.

"Don't worry about it Angel, it was my fault." Dean smiled back.

"Bathrooms free", she said, stepping to the side to let him pass.

"Okey dokey, I'll see you in ten then", he winked at her before walking into the bathroom.

Cas heard the water start a few seconds later and realised that she had once again been staring off into space, and padded across the carpet into her bedroom, shutting the door behind her.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

She heard the water stop and decided it was probably a good idea to get dressed. She pulled on her jeans and her sloppy joe jumper, which was baggy and comfy but sat nicely on her hips. She tied her hair back in a loose bun for sitting on the sofa, as she had an amazing knack of catching the ends behind her shoulders and tugging on them when she moved her head. It was embarrassing and despite Dean saying he found her cute when she was embarrassed, she was not going to go there.

Dean knocked on the door at that moment snapping her out of her master plan of how not to look like an idiot.

"Can I come in?" he asked through the wood.

"Yes, of course", she said, walking over to the door and pulling it open by the dressing gown hanging on the back of it.

He was stood on the landing, towel in one hand, his hair spiky and dripping, and yesterday's t-shirt clinging where his skin was still damp. Once again, she was taken aback that in any given situation he could look that gorgeous.

She realised with a blush that as she was running her eyes up and down his body, he was doing the same to her, noticing that her jumper had slipped off one shoulder, exposing her bra strap. He strode over and pulled it lovingly towards her collar bone, oblivious, or maybe not, to the effect that it had on her heart rate. He pulled her into a bear hug.

"Why?" she managed to say, her mouth covered by one of Dean's biceps.

"I just feel so happy, and awake." He grinned at her. "So you coming?"

She grabbed her bag off the back of her desk chair, "sure."

They walked quickly down the stairs, she waited for Dean in the hall while he grabbed his jacket, he walked back through the sitting room door grinning at her as they stepped across the threshold into the crisp morning. Cas pulled the door shut behind her and tucked the key under the plant pot, knowing her brother will have forgotten to take one. The walk to the bike was short and as she slid on she thought that she had never been happier than right at that very moment.

The bike pulled up in front of a large run-down house, the impala was parked in the driveway. Curtains that had once been pale blue floral hug in the windows, the white paint was flaking of the front of the house and a couple of the slates of the roof were broken. Overall it looked like it needed a bit of tlc, but Cas thought it was gorgeous. She had a thing for houses with quirks, even though she lived in a semi-detached, two-storey house on a normal housing estate, she would always consider that her mum's house. She dreamed of living just outside of a small town, in a big old house, that was done up to be homely but kept all of its charm. She particularly loved beamed ceilings.

Dean pulled up into the driveway behind his dad's car and helped Cas off. It didn't matter that he had done that so many times, she still felt a rush of electricity pass from his fingertips. She wondered if he felt it too.

"I'm sorry its' such a dump", he smiled apologetically down at her. " My dad keeps on meaning to fix it up, but he's busy with his work at the moment."

"Are you kidding, I love it!" she said truthfully, smiling when his face softened. "May I request a guided tour?"

"Sure", he laughed at the anticipation radiating from the blue of her eyes.

They climbed up the steps to the front porch, pausing before opening the door, Dean turned around looking out over the field opposite. He pointed at a sad looking rocking chair sitting near the wall, "that's where my mum used to sit in the evenings and sing to me and Sammy" he said sadly. "Sam was too young to remember but sometimes I come out here, makes me feel close to her."

He turned back to Cas, who seeing the tears he was holding back, reached up and put her arms round his neck allowing him to lean his forehead in the crook of her neck. She could feel his breath hot against her skin.

She wondered why she never cried about her parents. She supposed it was because she had never known her dad and her mum had actively decided to leave them. She wished she could cry about not having parents, but the fact was that she much preferred living with Gabe. He helped her out and fed her when she was younger, but never told her off for eating too much cake or leaving muddy boots in the hall. They had the perfect arrangement as far as she was concerned,.

Dean stood up straight, smiling at her as though to say thank you, took her hand and lead her through the front door.

There was custard and popcorn everywhere. Other than that the house was tidy, there were stacks of books leaning up against the walls, but that added to the charm.

Dean's jaw dropped at the sight of the yellow covering the floor. "SAMMY!" he yelled up the stairs. A muffled giggle drifted through the house. Dean stomped over to the cupboard on the opposite wall and pulled the door open sharply. A gangly young boy with spiky hair fell out laughing as he rolled over at Dean's feet.

"Garth?" Dean questioned, "What are you doing here? Where is Sam? And what is all this mess?!"

The boy smiled innocently up from where he was lying. "Well, we were hungry…" he answered pushing himself up.

"But when did you get here? And why is the food everywhere?" Dean asked, trying to suppress his anger.

"Well… Sam forgot to put the lid on the popcorn, and then… well we had a food fight…"

"With custard?" Cas asked, finding the whole situation hilarious.

"Yeah… It goes really well with popcorn" Garth grinned leaning round Dean to answer her.

"Well, where is Sam?" Dean asked the second that there came a clattering down the wooden staircase.

Sam stopped in his tracks, sliding across the floor when he stood in a patch of custard and crashing into Garth who fell over again, leaving the younger boys in a giggling pile on the floor, with an un-amused Dean staring down at them.

Sam gazed up at Dean with his big hazel eyes peeking out from below his mousy coloured fringe, he opened his mouth but Dean cut him off. "I don't want to hear it, but I am going to go into the den to watch a film with Cas and you and this chucklehead better have cleaned this up before I have to take you to Karate."

Sam nodded up at his brother before waving sheepishly at Cas, as Dean took her hand and pulled her through to the den, making sure to avoid the patches of custard on the floor.


	9. Chapter 9

"So how come you know Phantom Menace is your favourite?" Dean asked as they sank down into the beanbags.

"Gabriel loves them. He makes us watch them all the time." She replied simply, realising how much of her was her life and how much she liked it.

"You're very close to him aren't you? I mean, I'm close to Sammy but you two seem co-dependant."

She sighed, knowing that this would come eventually. She pulled Dean's hand into her land and began to fiddle with his watch, as she took a deep breath. This would be a long story.

"Well… my mum left when I was nine, I didn't know my dad but Gabe had and always blamed her for him leaving, it's very likely it was her fault, she was a nightmare. She had a routine for everything and viewed any kind of emotion as a weakness. She treated us like we were her soldiers and she was our drill sergeant. I was lucky, I like reading and I don't make friends easily so staying home and studying in my room wasn't too hard, but Gabe as unruly. He wanted to go out with his friends to parties and eat whatever whenever. I think we both realised she hated him and he most definitely hated her, pushing her buttons whenever possible. She hit him a couple of times." Cas said this neutrally as though she was reading from the back of a packet. She had learned to control the anger she felt towards her mother.

"He always came to my room after one of their fights, knowing I had heard the whole thing. I was the calm in the centre of his storm and he was mine. He would lie next to me, his arms around my shoulders and resting his chin on the top of my head and telling me stories until I fell asleep. Mum always stormed out of the house after an argument but I never knew where she went; only that she came back in the morning, her usual military, emotionless self. The day she left, it was Gabe that threw her out, as she had tried to do to him so many times." Here Cas paused, preparing herself for the next part, the hardest part.

"They had been fighting so much that week, over little nothings, like when Gabe left the kitchen door ajar instead of shutting it. I was in my room when I heard something smash and Gabe cry out. I ran down stairs to see Gabe with a gash on his forehead and fractions of a wineglass around his feet as well as the wine running down the white wall. That was when I lost it. Gabe was my rock and she was a monster. All my anger built up, I ran at her beating my hands against her chest screaming. I don't know what I was shouting; the red haze was too thick.

"She shoved me away from her and as the backs of my knees hit the coffee table, I fell over smacking my head on the hard floor. Gabe's eyes glazed over then. He walked over to her where she was stood panting, staring at me lying on the floor, tears silently flowing over my cheeks. I had no words left. All I could do was stare back, showing her how much I didn't care about her and how she was no longer my mother. Gabe picked her up over her shoulder. She kicked and screamed at him to put her down, among other things, but he ignored it and carried her to the door pulling it open and dropping her down on the step, slamming the door in her face and pulling the bolt across.

"He rushed over to me and ran his fingers through my hair, asking me if I was alright, saying she was gone and not to worry, but I didn't move just stared at the purple stain running down the wall where the glass had splashed. The ferocious banging on the door snapped me out of my trance and I flung my arms around Gabe's neck, burying my face in his hair. I asked him what would happen if she called the police, but he said she wouldn't dare because of what she did to us.

"I noticed the blood drying on his face and stood up pulling him through to the kitchen to wash the wound, grabbing a bag of peas from the freezer on the way. When his head was clean, we went upstairs, gathered all of her clothes, shoes and stupid cherub collection and threw them down to the lawn as she shouted up at us amongst the piles of clothes and smashed china. They were all gone in the morning, so we assumed she had gone. We still don't know where she went, and don't care either. Gabe and I have the perfect arrangement. He's my best friend as well as my brother. Sure he's an arse on occasion and only eats cake, but I couldn't live without him."

She finished her story still staring down at their hand sand shivered slightly at the memory of her mother. She looked up to see Dean staring directly in front of him, his jaw tight as though he were clenching his teeth.

She looked back down, wondering if his life story anyway resembled hers. She twiddled with the bracelet Dean had given her, before glancing back up at him, looking straight into his green eyes.

He pulled her into his lap and gripped her shoulders tightly.

"If anyone ever does that to you again, I will do more than throw them out." He whispered through his teeth.

He let go of her arms and stroked the back of her head and placing a gentle kiss on her lips.

"I love you." He mumbled against her mouth.

She pulled back to check she had head him correctly. His face was soft, his eyes sincere as he looked at her.

"I… I love you too." She said, her heart beating faster, causing a light pink to run across her cheek bones.

Dean smiled and ran his thumbs across her skin, just as he had on their first date. He pulled her back in for a kiss before lifting her back onto her seat and getting up to turn the TV on. He put the disc in and returned to his spot next to Cas, wrapping his arm round her shoulder and leaning her head against his chest, just as 'A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away…' scrolled up the screen.


End file.
